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home > Marriage and Divorce

MARRIAGE & DIVORCE

"For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and be joined to his wife; andthey shall become one flesh." - Genesis 2:24

What do I do if I don't love my spouse anymore?

There are times when we don't feel like we are "one flesh" with our spouse.

The problem is that we are fallen. Genesis 2:24 is before the fall, when Adam and Eve could be perfectly one flesh. We do not experience that perfection--but that still is not an excuse for divorce.

When someone says they no longer love their spouse, that usually means they no longer feel romantic love. But, marriages are not built on romantic love. The truth is that it is a rare marriage that does not experience a falling away from romantic love.

The Bible does not give a loss of love as an allowable reason for divorce. It does say that a husband is to love his wife. (Colossians 3:19, for example). In saying this the Bible is not talking about romantic love, but a caring concern about the welfare of the other person type of love. This is a type of love that does not just happen. It requires that we make a decision to love, and then that we put out effort to carry through with our decision to love.

For example, this type of love involves making a conscience effort to think, "What can I do today that will make my wife (or husband) fell better or be happier today?" And then doing it in a cheerful, giving, way.

 

   

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