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home > Marriage and Divorce


"but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery." Matthew 5:32 (NASB)

My spouse is cheating on me.

The answer is never automatically divorce.

There is one acceptable reason for Christians getting a divorce -- unchastity. If your spouce has a a physical, sexual relationship with someone other than you--in current terminology: cheating--the Bible says you can get a divorce.

If your spouse cheats on you, does that automatically mean divorce? Not necessarily. It was very difficult, and the consequences in a loss of trust still linger after 14 years, but my marriage survived my unchastity.

And always remember, although in the case of unchastity divorce is an option, remarriage is never an option. Marriage always remains ONE man and ONE woman, forever. The person who is not respecting their wedding vows should keep this in mind--based on the Bible, divorce and remarriage marriage is not an option.

"For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband; for otherwise your children are unclean, but now they are holy." - 1 Corinthians 7:14

What should you do if you want to avoid divorce? I can tell you what my wife did. Pray. Not only did she pray, she got everyone at church to pray, including the little kids. She got all her Christian friends to pray. What did they pray for? Cheating and adultery was never mentioned. They prayed that God would extend His grace to me and that I would become a believer who trusted in Jesus Christ. She trusted in prayer and Jesus Christ.

A good book is Dr. Laura's "The Proper Care and Feeding of A Husband". From the title it may sound as though this book is about becoming subservient to your husband in order to win him back. That's not the case. It's hard to describe this book in a sentence, but it is worth reading.

IMPORTANT: If you facing abuse or threats of any nature, find help locally immediately. Get out. Do not stay in a location or situation in which you or your children are being, or might be physically hurt.



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